So, Coral Island, right? Or as the fancy types call it, Koh Hae. Honestly, who can be bothered with the posh name after a couple of Chang beers? It’s basically that sweet little patch of sand super close to Phuket – like, a proper stone’s throw away. But it feels like you’ve properly buggered off to your own little island for the day. The boat? Fifteen mins tops. Barely enough time to think about whether you necked too many Singhas last night before you’re already there, phone out, taking those proper “look at me, I’m on holiday” snaps.
Proper Paradise, Mate (Yeah, Yeah, I Know…)
Rocking up to Coral Island is like walking straight into one of those ridiculously filtered Insta pics. White sand that doesn’t burn the soles of your feet off? Sorted. Water so blue you’d reckon it’s been Photoshopped to hell? Double sorted. I was half expecting it to be one of those tourist traps that’s all hype and no trousers, but fair play, it’s actually banging.
The Beach Clubs: Bit Flash, Bit Boozy, All Good
There are two main gangs running the show: Heaven Beach Club and Banana Beach Club. Heaven’s the one where the money’s at – think fancy wooden bits, beanbags that look too cool to sit on, and cocktails that cost a bomb but you get anyway because, well, you’re on holiday. Banana Beach Club is a bit more my speed – less “look at my yacht,” more “pass the sunscreen.” Still just as chilled though, and you get less of those influencers doing the whole “look at my avocado toast” routine every five minutes. Seriously, saw one bird spend a good hour posing with a melting smoothie. She still stuck it on the ‘gram. Mental.
Stuff to Actually Do (If Your Head’s Not Still Thumping)
- Snorkeling: Right, the coral’s seen better days thanks to us lot being muppets, but the fish are still pretty decent. Plus, it’s better than watching some bloke with a serious dad bod doing bombs off his longtail boat.
- Parasailing and Banana Boats: If you’re into that whole “nearly crapping yourself” vibe with a side of adrenaline, then crack on. I bottled it, but my mate went for it, and her screams of what I think was enjoyment echoed across the water. Good for a laugh though, wasn’t it?
- Sea Kayaking: I actually did this one. Started off lovely, all peaceful and that. Then I remembered that using your arms is actually exercise, and I instantly regretted all those skipped gym sessions. Still, found some little hidden beaches, got a bit of a tan (or a burn, knowing my luck) – worth it, I reckon.
- Hiking: There’s a spot where you can get a view. Go if you want to make your mates back home even more jealous than they already are. Bit of a sweaty climb, but let’s be honest, you’re probably already sweating, so just go with it.
Island Grub (aka Lunchtime)
The food situation was surprisingly alright. Loads of grilled seafood, fried rice (you can’t go wrong, can you?), and fruit platters. Nothing Michelin star, but tasty enough to shut my inner food critic up for a bit. Banana Beach’s kitchen was a winner, mostly because the prawns didn’t taste like they’d been fished out of a canal.
Golden Hour: Pure Vibes
When the afternoon starts winding down, Coral Island goes from a bit of a lively tourist spot to a proper chilled-out picture postcard. As the boats start heading back and the sun starts doing its thing, the whole place gets this dreamy feel about it. Grab a cold one, stick your feet in the sand, and just switch off. It’s one of those moments where you genuinely think about packing it all in and opening that smoothie shack you always joke about. No word of a lie, I actually did the sums in my head.
The Honest Truth: Worth the Trip?
Yeah, go on. It’s touristy, sure, but not in an “I want to punch everyone” kind of way. Coral Island isn’t trying to be anything groundbreaking, just a decent place to chill, see some nice views, and get away from the madness of Phuket for a bit. Go for the day, have a laugh, get a bit tipsy, maybe see a fish or two, and definitely have a good old moan when it’s time to leave.
Because you will. Trust me. I did. Loudly.